Since 1970 this date, April 22, has been designated as THE day to heighten awareness of the issues plaguing the planet are raised. In reality, it is merely a feel-good day to stroke the individuals need to feel good. Allow me to explain..............

   

This year the theme is End Plastic Pollution. To get started on your crusade click here. After reading, this will wet the appetite so that you can go all in and do your part to save the planet. Become aware of all the plastic that you come in contact with daily and start reducing and reclaiming and recycling this man-made item. Then next week or month when you purchase the next whatever that will inevitably be packaged in plastic you will dutifully spend the time and effort to have this scourge properly disposed of in the recycle bin that is either in your home or a few miles drive away. What you say!? Refer to paragraph one.

 

My mission is done here. Thank you for your time. Remember when it comes to causes they should be seen as a lifelong journey and as Loa Tzu said......... 

"Every journey begins with the first step."

 

The EPA was created in 1970 as an offshoot of EARTH DAY. So it is only fitting that we take a look at what's happening there today. Click here.

 

 

 

       

 

 

 

 

 

 

Golf is boring. Just a bunch of old men chasing a ball around in the woods. If you're not athletic, you can always play golf. I've heard these and many more. My personal favorite is, "Looks so easy. Anyone can play golf". Of course, if this were true then why aren't there many more playing professionally and earning that easy multiple thousands, even millions of dollars every year? 

 

Having played the game for 20+ years I can assure you that to do it you have to be somewhat athletically inclined and willing to devote time and practice to your game. Most important you better be very humble lest wise the course will send you away with a rash, bitterness, ulcers and the need to seek out a therapist. At most a closet alcoholic. 

 

Swinging the club is a challenge in concentration and ultimate body control. If you fail to keep your head down and eye on the ball through contact with it you will whiff it to your side or miss it altogether. If you drop your shoulder you'll hit behind the ball. If your knee bend is too deep or too shallow as you come through the ball your control is non-existent. There are so many other things that must be properly executed at the right time or your shot attempt will be so errant that your language will make a sailor blush. 

 

While playing the sport I had the good fortune of playing many great courses. The Pinehurst Resort in North Carolina is the most prestigious one that I had the honor of allowing to totally humiliate me and send me and my shattered self-esteem to the 19th hole to partake of a river of Absolute on the rocks as I swore revenge in the future if I didn't have my clubs melted down to teach them a lesson!!

 

While at Pinehurst I played the #7 course and the #2 course. The #2 course is the one that has seen many PGA tournaments. See Chart:

share ($)
1936	PGA Championship	Denny Shute	1,000
1951	Ryder Cup	United States	n/a
1962	U.S. Amateur	Labron Harris Jr.	n/a
1994	U.S. Senior Open	Simon Hobday	145,000
1999	U.S. Open	Payne Stewart	625,000
2005	U.S. Open	Michael Campbell	1,170,000
2008	U.S. Amateur	Danny Lee	n/a
2014	U.S. Open	Martin Kaymer	1,620,000
	U.S. Women's Open	Michelle Wie	720,000
2019	U.S. Amateur		n/a
2024	U.S. Open

    

I stopped playing several years ago. After I semi-retired I lost interest playing golf and traveling so much. However, I will admit I miss seeing strokes being made such as this: 

See you at the 19th hole

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

UMMMM........ Grilled cheese sandwich. What're your favorite flavors to add to this delicacy? The choices seem endless. Including the choice of cheese types. American, cheddar, swiss and on and on. I never tried goat cheese and never will but to each his own. 

 

Now there is Mayochup. A combination mix of ketchup and mayonnaise. Good for hamburgers, hotdogs, and..... french fries. This last item will go over here in Costa Rica very well. I had never known people that preferred mayo to dip their fries into until I started going into fast food joints here. I also have learned that the mixture is good to use as a dipping sauce for shrimp. Cocktail sauce is rare to find here and when you can you practically need a second mortgage to afford a small bottle. But I digress.

 

Accounts of man melting cheese on bread dates back to the Romans but the modern day grilled cheese sandwich is mainly attributed to the 1920's. This is when sliced bread became common when Otto Frederick Rohwedder invented the machine to do that task. He had created the prototype in 1912 but that was destroyed in a fire and he plugged on and had the perfected model ready in 1928. In 1965 supermarkets began stocking individually wrapped cheese slices and around that time people started putting the second slice of bread on top and thus the sandwich was born to stimulate people to start experimenting with different items to bulk up the main course to be served with french fries and a soft drink.  

 

If you want to be adventurous as you celebrate this day then click here for 50 recipes to delight your palate. Of course, a good soup rounds out this all American meal. I was unable to find a good wine list reference for grilled cheese sandwiches but experience tells me that any cold beer will be perfect to flush down the creation of your choice.

        

 

 

Left lane slowpokes 

 

 

So you like life in the slow lane. If you are caught in Virginia it could cost you $100.

                                                                                                                               

 

Since July 1, 2017 thousands have been ticketed for driving too slow in the fast (left) lane. Although the law has been on the books for awhile it was pulled out, dusted off and clarified and then enforced aggressively by the State Police. Personally, I give Kudos to them!

 

You have your cruise control set listening to a favorite tune on the CD player making good time and as you pull into the fast lane to pass a slower car and maintain your momentum when boom, there is a driver on his/her Sunday drive on a weekday impervious to the fact that due to your quick reflexes you just saved them from meeting that maker they are dwelling on. As you curse and use many un-PC words and shove the horn into the steering column they reconnect with reality and wonder what is your problem. Your blood pressure rises and for the next 50 miles, your day is ruined and you are now a believer that a $100 fine is just not enough. 

 

So if you find yourself pedaling down the highways of Virginia stay in the right lane unless passing or prepare to shell out a C-Note For driving the rest of us crazy. 

 

   

 

 

 

  

 

 

 

 

 

Jimmy Kimmel

Late night comedy. Late night Trump bashing. Late night leave the illegal immigrants alone but laugh at me as I make fun of the first ladies accent. Afterall, she's a LEGAL immigrant. Only illegal immigrants have the right to have an accent or for that matter not even speak English. No one knows if this is Jimmy Kimmel's thoughts but they are definitely his actions. Watch the above clip from his latest attempt to embarrass the First Lady. This from a creature, oops, a man that says that America needs immigrants to be viable. He just doesn't admit that they need to be illegal and on the taxpayer's dole. Kimmel is entitled to his opinion like all people are. But is he entitled to trash others that he doesn't like every weeknight on national TV?   

 

I think it’s noise. It’s been noisy and competitive since day one because this agency has been a bastion of liberalism since day one. As we are making progress there and also reducing the regulatory burden, it is infuriating to those that have dominated and controlled the agency for years.

 

 

Scott Pruitt 

(Washington Times podcast)

Time to go Pruitt!! You are a stain and a fraud. You were in charge of the EPA and to correct some of the wrongs in some of the regulations that are blatantly ridiculous. Instead, you have turned your position and power into a personal crusade to help your cronies in the oil industry while at the same time attempting to position yourself as some power hungry Czar. And the LIES! (click here). To parrot a sincerely meant phrase, "Throw the bum out"!  

 

"One of the greatest delusions in the world is the hope that
the evils in this world are to be cured by legislation."  

Thomas B. Reed

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Where were you on Dyngus Day? What?? You ask is Dyngus Day!? I guess that you aren't Polish. Please allow me to enlighten you.

 

This is a celebration that dates back to the baptism of Polish Prince Mieszko I in 966 A.D. Today it is celebrated on the Monday after Easter with subdued fanfare in cities like Buffalo, New York, Chicago, Illinois; Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania; Bristol, Connecticut; Elizabeth, New Jersey; and South Bend, Indiana. Like St. Patricks Day, on this day everyone is a little Polish. The jury is still out as to whether this is a good thing or a bad thing. 

It is celebrated with the men getting the women wet and tapping them with a pussy willow branch. For those that have the improper images in their head let me clarify. Today squirt guns are used for the wet part and a pussy willow is a flowering plant. Both these activities are a way of the male(s) showing an interest in the female(s). This is a far cry from today's youth that prefers sexing from their phones. Although this may well get the girl(s) wet and hope to get their pu..........never mind.

 

Food and drink for the festivities include but are not limited to Polish beer (no, they are not called brewski's), pierogis, kielbasa, stuffed cabbage, ham, eggs, sausage, specialty breads, and lamb-shaped butter. Polka music is a tradition on Dyngus Day and it is often mandatory for participants to dance at least once. Parties typically start in the mid-morning on Monday with a buffet of traditional fare and go on until after sunrise on Tuesday. There are currently no studies on the hangover rate at work on the Tuesday return from the previous 24-hour lovefest. 

 

So mark your calendars for April 22, 2019. Now that you know that on that date you can party with beer, food, dance and get some women wet and touch their pussy willows.

 

Polish Beer

 

  

 

 

 

 

                                                   Judge Judy Sheindlin

 

Judge Judith Sheindlin will appear today on all the major Sunday morning news shows to defend her landmark decision that saw the Easter Bunny fined $5000 per day for life after being found guilty of having an extra-marital affair with the Chick-fil-a spokes chicken. It was proven by a preponderance of the evidence that the two had steamy, torrid rendezvous across the globe for eons. 

 

to protect the children

The EB continues to proclaim his innocence. His defense is that he could never have done this horrid activity with a chicken! He stated that everyone knows that they are nasty birds that eat their own feces. Also, she could never keep up with his sexual prowess. EB said that humility would not allow him to explain or show the court his massive manhood but if he had done what he is accused of the damn walking feather farm would not be able to sit for days let alone lay eggs. 

Can be seen at chickporn.com

For her part, Chicy said that she did not find the EB attractive at all. She is in a committed relationship with Foghorn Leghorn. At this time she coughed up a furball and exclaimed, "How did that get there"! As she adjusted her position in the seat she made a vague reference to an ongoing hemorrhoid condition. 

Judge Judy flicked a fly that had been buzzing around her head and admonished Chicy for the bird poop between her toes and barked her favorite line, "They don't keep me here because I'm beautiful. They keep me here because I'm smart."      

 

The ruling that Judge Judy imposed is to go to the support of the EB's multitude of children and the legal fees of Mrs. EB's attorney, Bugs. 

That's all for today's edition of 

 **No chocolate bunnies or eggs were harmed during this report