Sunday, February 12, 2017
Sunday, February 5, 2017
I
observed a segment of our population that is very
attached to their hand-held devices. I fear this
will only get worse. I predict we will start to
see people dying from having their heads bent over
their hand-held electronic devices since their
necks will give out. I wanted to provide a sample
obituary for these individuals that die from a
broken neck to make it easier for family and
friends to publish an obituary.
I propose
the following:
____________
passed away last evening. His/her neck finally broke due
to the constant use of an electronic hand held device.
There will be no viewing since no one has seen his/her
face for many years and no one knows what they look like
other than what the top of their head looks like. There
will be no quotes of wise things they may have said
since they became mute after only using text messages,
instant messages and Facebook to communicate. The
Facebook page for ____________ will be left open so you
can post your virtual flowers and the emoji of your
choice on their timeline. Donations may be made to the
"Save our Necks and Thumbs Fund." This group has
retained a group of scientists who are working
feverishly to develop a chip that can be implanted in
brains allowing access to the internet including games,
social media, etc. by using your thoughts. The family is
asking that you make the ultimate sacrifice as a tribute
to the deceased by shutting down all of your electronic
devices for one minute on ________ at ______ am/ pm.
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